Jonathan

This morning...

[ME]:       Oh, good morning. You snuck right behind me.

[JONATHAN]: How much time have you got?

[ME]:       [glances at cell phone] It's 5:45. I have about fifteen minutes.
            [opens up medicine cabinet and takes out Q-tips and deodorant]

[JONATHAN]: [laughs] You trust that thing? What was it you told me back in
            college? 'Never trust a machine.' Look what's happened to you.

[ME]:       What? And you don't trust them? Come on! Look at the project.
            We've re-integrated the AGC.

[JONATHAN]: [laughs] You trust that thing? What was it you told me back in
            college? 'Never trust a machine.' Look what's happened to you.

[ME]:       What? And you don't trust them? Come on! Look at the project.
            We've re-integrated the AGC. Who was it that helped me do that?
            Oh, that's right. It was you.

[JONATHAN]: That was different.

[ME]:       Your cutesy smile will get you no where. And how was it
            different?

[JONATHAN]: That was work. This isn't.

[ME]:       My watch is in the bedroom.

[JONATHAN]: Also a machine. So tell me, what time was it when you looked at
            the phone.

[ME]:       5:45. I told you.

[JONATHAN]: And now?

[ME]:       [glances at phone] Fuck! That wasn't just fifteen minutes!

[JONATHAN]: Don't look at me.

[ME]:       This is your fault.

[JONATHAN]: Time dilation.

[ME]:       Bullshit dilation. It's my fucking brain.

[JONATHAN]: You want me to leave?

[ME]:       Don't put me in that spot. You know I can't tell you to leave.
            It's up to you. I'm late. I'm putting my headphones in.