## 31 Half

I had my birthday a few weeks ago and I'm feeling different this time. It was not like every year because I just changed the ten, the first digit in my age. I have now the feeling to be at the half of my life. But who knows, it could be the third or two thirds ? 

Looking back over the last few years, I could say that I've been working in the same company for a little more than half of my life. But maybe I'm also halfway through my working life. I can only imagine what retirement will be like. When I say it's half my life, it's only with statistics and looking at the age and life of my own parents. I'm not a medium and I don't want to know when I'm going to die.  I've also spent half my life with my wife and it wasn't the same for my parents because of the age difference between them. If all goes well, it will be two-thirds of our lives at the end. It seems so rare these days with all the divorces. Just around me, half the neighbours have divorced.

I feel old and I don't have half the vitality, the strength or the ability to recover quickly that I used to have. Some doctors used to say that our bodies are not made to last this long. I don't care, but I'm like an old car with more time in the garage for maintenance. I don't think the same way about travelling. I'm always a backpacker, but sometimes walking isn't the best solution. I've learned to look after myself... and my wife, of course. But we have also seen half of what we wanted to see in our lives. Oh, I wanted to see the whole world when I was young, but now, with too many people in some destinations and many ways to see everything with screens, I don't want the same. I had the chance to travel thousands of kilometres from France and see some of my dreams. I can live with these wonderful souvenirs for the second half of my life and choose different experiences... And also think about the consequences for the planet. Apart from travelling, there are a lot of experiences and sports. It was great a
nd I could not have imagined this when I was a teenager.

When I think about my ancestors, or just my parents and grandparents, I'm always happy because I feel I've seen more than they have. I've read and watched a lot of books and films. When I look at the databases, it seems like there's so little compared to all the cultural knowledge, but so much compared to what people can do. I always feel lucky because I have a huge choice of books, films, music, ... Maybe it's half of what I would acquire as knowledge, or maybe more. But I don't have to think about it. The half, it's just a milestone in a life, like other milestones. The first diploma, the first job, the wedding, etc... It's just a date, a mark of a change in our lives. This particular age is another, but it's just a date. I had started to change my way of life and to evolve. I know that life for me is a constant evolution. I can't stay the same, even if I can give the impression of staying the same. For example, I've been blogging for more than 15 years. That's not even half my life. I'm not sure I'll be d
oing the same thing in 10 years. I have periods where I'm passionate about one thing for months, years, ... I don't want to have a plan for the second half of my life.

Life is full of surprises. I've been in the same company for years, but I've done 5 different jobs, and in particular 3 different domains. Sometimes it was good, sometimes it was bad, but I kept the good and learned from the bad about people and myself. I'm thinking about the next few years and finding a new challenge. I've created what I wanted to create in the company, but I know that it can all be ephemeral. Just as I'm typing on the keyboard, I hear the birds outside in the garden. I remember what my father told me about the sound of birds and what they looked like. Maybe I was too young to remember, but that's a good thing in life. My father was about my age when he told me that. I have different abilities to him. But it always offers new perspectives for the second half and all the halves of what a life is.

2Dɛ

=> mailto:icemanfr@sdf.org Comments by mail
or by a reply on your blog