Dilip
    <arasa@fastmail.com>                                       16 Apr 2022
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                      Crawling out of the pandemic years.

    The covid-19 pandemic does not have an end date. However, various
    government enforced policies related to the pandemic have specific
    expiration dates, and among these, the end of the mask mandate is my
    pick for the event that marks the end of the pandemic.

    It has been a couple of weeks since the mask mandate ended in San
    Francisco, California. It's time to crawl out of shelter and take a
    look at the damage done (if any).

    Taking stock.
    =============
    I lost 2 years of my life. During 2020 and 2021, I did not travel, I
    did not meet new people, I did not date anyone. I lived alone, in my
    apartment, working remotely, and my only contacts were family, a
    handful of friends and my colleagues I saw on webcam meetings. I
    suspect that I have suffered severely mentally and emotionally during
    this period. Its hard to say for sure - I am vaguely aware that I am
    not the same as I was in 2019, however I don't yet recognize the full
    scale of everything that has changed for me.

    My plan in life was to find a partner an settle down by the time I turn
    32. I totally missed that life goal - I turned 32 in 2021 and
    celebrated alone at my apartment by ordering Pizza. Then, this year, I
    turned 33. Time doesn't stop for a pandemic unfortunately.

    My financial situation is not where I wanted it to be. Over the
    pandemic, I didn't save any money - I kept impulse buying junk and
    ordering in food via food delivery apps and essentially spent all the
    money I earned. I realized how much I've spent while doing my taxes
    last week. It was not a pleasant realization.

    I have managed to stay healthy the entire time. I'm not fit - but I
    have been more regular to the gym in the last few months. I'd say I've
    managed my health fairly well these past few years. I have so far
    managed to not catch covid - I wonder how much longer I can manage
    this.

    I'm incredibly lucky that all my friends and family have survived the
    pandemic. I know that not everyone has been this lucky, I'm very
    grateful for this good fortune. However, several people that I know
    have lost family and friends, and I think that when one day we all
    gather together and take stock of the pandemic toll, that number will
    be a little higher than what I imagine it is right now.

    Finally, I still have my life, health, friends and family. The most
    valuable thing I have is the ability to rebuild my life now. It's time
    to get to work.

    Where to begin rebuilding.
    ==========================
    This one is hard to answer. Roughly speaking, I want to stop being
    single and I want to start being more responsible with my health and
    finances. These aren't necessarily the aspects of my life that degraded
    the most during the pandemic. They are however, the things that I was
    trying to fix when the pandemic hit, and they suffered because I didn't
    get around to fixing them.

    It is a good question to ask if I should still worry about the same
    things I used to worry about back in 2019. I am 2 years older now, is
    it possible to skip past these and fix the problems I was expecting to
    solve 2 years later in 2019? I don't think that's the right thing to
    do.

    I mourn the loss of 2 precious years of my life. If I were to recover
    that lost time over the next 15 years, every day I must squeeze in 730
    days worth of time into 5475 days. That is 13% extra per day. I must
    live 27.2 hours squeezed into 24 hours of day.

    If I recover 3.2 extra hours per day, I'll regain my 2 years over the
    next 15 years.

    This will work for the things in my life that aren't anchored to
    specific phases or eras in my life.

    Finding a partner and settling down, or fixing my health and financial
    irresponsible behavior can't be deferred to little fixes over the next
    15 years. It needs to happen now.

    Next steps.
    ===========
    I think I should begin with little steps. How about a goal of saying
    hello to one new person every day. I can also start going to the gym
    for 10 mins, 2 times a week. Even if I do nothing at the gym. I should
    be able to cut down my spending by 25% this month.

    That sounds like a plan.

    I must also remember to help others who've had it worse than me over
    these past few years. All in all, I think I'm one of the lucky ones.