A few tired thoughts
August 2nd 2024
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Have a lot of random thoughts bouncing around in my head today. I was on 
a bus between cities yesterday which, y'know, was hard since that meant 
I was wearing a mask for over three hours straight without a sip of 
water. (this is a rare instance where my instincts of self-deprivation 
are helpful)

But it did give me a chunk of time unplugged and just a notebook and pen 
to occupy me. And it got me thinking about how, even though I have a 
huge collection of digital notes (at some point I'll write a gempost 
about how I use the emacs package denote for this...oh look of course my 
capsule is down as soon as I'm not there to fix it) that there's 
something inherently very different about pen & paper vs. digital 
collection.

And I don't just mean things like tactility I think it's partly the flow 
of time. The digital is good for the hyperlinked, scattered ideas, 
things to revist based on idea. In other words, "spatially" broad. 
Notebooks feel different because of how located in place and time they 
are. Even if you were to write in random sections non-linearlly I think 
it still captures time differently than digital notes. I'm having 
trouble articulating exactly what I mean by that.

I also realize I don't give myself enough space to let my mind wander. I 
often think I have a terrible memory but I think I might just have a 
memory easily overwhelmed by noise, where I need a lot of space to 
reintegrate thoughts and feelings.

Too much noise overwhelms that, even if it's notifications on a phone or 
scrolling online. I wonder how many other people feel like it was easier 
to remember things when we were more unplugged? It does imply, though, 
there's a solution of just giving yourself more space to think.

Anyway, gonna wander around for a bit before helping my partner tor get 
ready for the zine fest they're selling at tomorrow.