Cursed love.
~kebabmaster
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TLDR: My prediction on most of trans women + I don't want to be
gay.

K, I have experienced some sort of sad love inside myself for some
time.

There is that guy, who looks kinda weird. Long hair, no beard, and
it almost seems like he aims to be a girl. His voice is much more
feminine than anyone would expect from a man. He also mentioned on
his profiles that his pronouns are She/Her. Yet he has not been
declared as transgender by himself publically and formally. He
listens also to some... umm... "Undertale" like music... in general
there are vocals... but they are not as ravish/brutal as mine.

So as a typical schizo retard, who likes tin foil hats, is
interested in polishing the rough stone and working for the god,
and cried while watching neo/-nazi propaganda, I tried to stay away
from him because of the possible huge gap between our mindsets.

I must also mention that I haven't felt any love for any girl for a
long time. Not to mention, that the "rules" advise us to stay away
from them. My porn addiction has simply converted them into bags of
meat or stinky subhumans, which on the other hand was a pretty
successful way to quit this addiction.

But once upon a time, after a workout in the gym, I took a shower,
and while I was taking it, I suddenly started to touch my body very
hard. This was the moment I started falling into the gayish rabbit
hole. But knowing my beliefs on gays, I decided I needed to quit
thinking about this lusty stuff. So I decided to grow a beard. So
that I at least will have some sort of a scar or ugliness on my
face, so that they won't even let me step into this rabbit hole.
One problem that also haunts me to this day is my voice or look
that in some cases may just look or sound very childish, even
despite that beard.

But now, a new love challenge has arrived, and it is that guy I
mentioned at the beginning. The college has forced us to work
together. And we sill do it. But knowing my egoism or tendency
towards devilish acts, I think that if I would continue deepening
my relationship with him I would eventually try to make myself
profit, no matter what costs he would get. But also this may make
him think that the path that he is on is a path with a "positive"
outcome.

And so here I speculate on potential pathways this person may take
if his partner would leave him.

* "Small Pizzas" - He may think that the older his partner gets,
the less attracted he may be to him/her. So He/She may start to
look for younger partners who may be more attracted to him/her...
The problem is that he/she also will look older... and... yeah...
the younger, the worse.

* Detransition - I guess this may be the toughest path to take, but
the outcome of this path may potentially open a lot more
possibilities.

* Widow - Idk, Enlightment of some sort.

* Sudoku - You know.

I know that I can't assume that he is trans just by the few facts I
know about him... But I just wanted to write this up here so I
won't feel any regret for what would happen to him.

Please don't tell me I would have to support him/her now.
But anyway, what' ya think?