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Who is this Legend?
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|u/rabbiskittles - 16 hours
|
|Top tier troll resume


|u/Predator_ - 15 hours
|
|How long did they spend working at Hooli?


  |u/0ut0fBoundsException - 15 hours
  |
  |This is Gavin Belson’s LinkedIn


    |u/Predator_ - 15 hours
    |
    |He didn't build his resume from the middle out.


      |u/slapyak5318008 - 10 hours
      |
      |tip to tip


        |u/dcoolidge - 5 hours
        |
        |Girth matters


      |u/wandored - 9 hours
      |
      |Now I have to watch the series again.  Almost made it a year since
      |my last binge


    |u/Flowseidon9 - 7 hours
    |
    |Naw this has gotta be Big Head's  Failing upwards


      |u/ValleyBreeze - 5 hours
      |
      |100% Big Head. There's no other answer!


      |u/Tim_Drake_510 - 4 hours
      |
      |Such a visionary 


    |u/TheSpanxxx - 10 hours
    |
    |Lolololol.  Awesome


  |u/Ar1go - 12 hours
  |
  |3 months but promoted 3 times while there! Must be doing something
  |right


    |u/silent_boy - 11 hours
    |
    |Should be on cover on some magazine


  |u/LeaveIt2Kleber - 6 hours
  |
  |…this guy f*cks.


  |u/Total_Adept - 10 hours
  |
  |BIIIGG HHHEEEAd 🍃💨


|u/Throwaway_I_S - 12 hours
|
|Previously head of compliance at Theranos as well


  |u/duderino_okc - 9 hours
  |
  |Legend has it they started as an intern at Enron.


    |u/Nopengnogain - 4 hours
    |
    |Rumor is he is leaving his position at Netflix to be the Chief
    |Technology Advisor for the White House.


|u/dbgtboi - 15 hours
|
|It's even funnier when you realize that if this was a legit resume, most
|recruiters and hiring managers wouldn't realize the issue here and would
|jump at the chance to hire this guy.


  |u/off_by_two - 15 hours
  |
  |I mean, non-senior software engineer at a mid-tier startup to
  |organization head at Netflix in 4 years, with a stop at Google along
  |the way.  This would stand out from the crowd of applications for sure


  |u/dragonatorYT - 15 hours
  |
  |i find it more sad than funny :(


  |u/sian_half - 10 hours
  |
  |I’d say it’s a great hire, this person learnt many expensive lessons
  |and you didn’t have to pay for any of it


    |u/Ziazan - 10 hours
    |
    |I'd be worried that this person is incapable of learning


      |u/Techn0ght - 10 hours
      |
      |Yeah, it seems that way.


    |u/Cetun - 9 hours
    |
    |Well, if you go to a casino and you see someone bet all the money
    |they have on black, you have no idea whether or not the lesson he
    |learned was "Don't put all your money on one bet at the casino" or
    |if it was "Don't bet all your money on black"


      |u/ShadowVulcan - 5 hours
      |
      |When the real lesson was to have never gone to the casino in the
      |first place


      |u/coldfishcat - 8 hours
      |
      |Half your money on red?


    |u/sillybunny22 - 10 hours
    |
    |Exactly. The most in-demand cyber engineers are those at companies
    |right after cyber incidents. Having real-world experience of what
    |not to do next time is invaluable lol


    |u/jimineycricket123 - 4 hours
    |
    |I mean it obviously depends on the role you’re hiring for. Mid level
    |manager? Likely a great hire.  Visionary technical department lead
    |at a startup? Likely a disaster


    |u/strng_lurk - 8 hours
    |
    |Unless he learnt the next big lesson at your firm once hired.


  |u/Aphemia1 - 10 hours
  |
  |5 different companies in 3 years, that’s a red flag for most
  |recruiters


    |u/RRMarten - 5 hours
    |
    |*Most US recruiters. Other places they don't care as much about job
    |hopping or work gaps. In my experience US companies are a lot more
    |strict about this, they need those obedient loyal workers to put up
    |with their bullshit.


      |u/washoutr6 - 4 hours
      |
      |I gotta say, when I took a 3 year work hiatus I got the 3rd
      |degree, by a shitty security guard company, I just told them I was
      |in property management. From then on I just said I was self
      |employed in property management.


      |u/SweetVarys - 1 hour
      |
      |Switching every 6 months is a red flag everywhere. It’s very
      |expensive to hire and train someone just to have them quit in 6
      |months, you’ll like cost more than you give for that time


  |u/xampl9 - 9 hours
  |
  |They’ve got upper level management written all over them


  |u/TheNoMan - 12 hours
  |
  |Nah.. 0 reliability.


  |u/bruceleroy99 - 2 hours
  |
  |I am scared at how many comments responding to you are saying this
  |person would a good hire - there are so many red flags here I don't
  |even know where to start lol.


  |u/wokittalkit - 12 hours
  |
  |🎶 Failing on up, to the East Side 🎶


  |u/Wiskid86 - 14 hours
  |
  |Or gal


|u/1-grain-of-sand - 11 hours
|
|Captain, Exxon Valdez.


  |u/ninjahosk - 11 hours
  |
  |Middle name Enron


    |u/lungleg - 7 hours
    |
    |SVP Mortgage-backed Securities, Lehman Bros.


      |u/NinjaOfPorn - 2 hours
      |
      |Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m a man of wealth and
      |taste.


|u/Knee-Awkward - 12 hours
|
|Its clearly a joke but at an executive level this is literally how their
|career progression looks and its infuriating. The CEOs just jump between
|the companies they absolutely destroy, because for the brief time they
|were there, they managed to make some extremely short term money that
|makes the stock go up and triggers their contractual bonuses. Fully
|knowing that the benefits are at the expense of the future of the entire
|company


  |u/Xenoanthropus - 7 hours
  |
  |I remember the moment I decided I was going to quit a previous job I
  |had at now-defunct HHGregg.  They were having financial troubles, so
  |they hired some people from Sears/Kmart to try and turn things around.
  |Of all the people they could have hired to try to save the company,
  |they chose to hire people who had just failed to save a different one.


  |u/MyRockNRollSoul - 9 hours
  |
  |You may have just identified the precise point at which capitalism
  |turns cancerous!


|u/rarescenarios - 14 hours
|
|He's a real straight shooter with upper management written all over him.


  |u/blackhorse15A - 9 hours
  |
  |It's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.


|u/potatodrinker - 14 hours
|
|Netflix - Head of unboxing


|u/fearnemeziz - 16 hours
|
|That’s me, but I’ve worked as a janitor.


|u/hotdogstroker - 15 hours
|
|Head of Accounting Department Enron 1996-2002


  |u/skynetempire - 10 hours
  |
  |CEO of Enron Energy Services and Enron Xcelerator - Lou Pai. Got away
  |with 250 million lol


|u/sephtater - 10 hours
|
|Can’t wait to see this tomorrow on r/PeterExplainsTheJoke


|u/Dylan-the-villan - 9 hours
|
|Missing the quality control engineer at Boeing


|u/ObviouslyTriggered - 12 hours
|
|I don't know why was this edited, the actual CV is far worse....
|[https://i.imgur.com/JKSQx6p.png](https://i.imgur.com/JKSQx6p.png)


  |u/nntb - 11 hours
  |
  |Maybe the joke was to give him a CV that was experienced in a somewhat
  |related field rather than a journalist


  |u/raindog_ - 9 hours
  |
  |Wait… this is legit? What the fuck. As someone who has worked in live
  |sport/event streaming this is unbelievable.


  |u/ReaperKing05 - 7 hours
  |
  |I don't get it. All I see is someone who didn't stick to one place.
  |What else is being assumed?


    |u/Waanii - 7 hours
    |
    |That's a freelance writer that's somehow ended up leading a team of
    |software engineers, he probably doesn't have expertise in data
    |engineering, video encryption or just general software / video
    |livestream knowledge, how he landed this position is kinda whacky,
    |you'd think they'd poach someone from Twitch to handle this.....


    |u/git0ffmylawnm8 - 5 hours
    |
    |Dude it's seriously raising red flags for me. Undergrad
    |history/sociology degree, started his career at an investment firm 2
    |years after graduating, got an MBA, pivoted into being a writer,
    |made some nonsensical AI app, and got his gig at Netflix   This
    |individual has 0 qualifications to lead a team of engineers,
    |especially at Netflix scale. What the fuck.


    |u/Bill-Maxwell - 5 hours
    |
    |If you can’t stick it out for more than a couple years it’s a red
    |flag because perseverance is one of the keys to success.  It makes
    |me think all you care about is your ambition and everything else
    |will suffer for it.


|u/EntertainmentOwn3845 - 15 hours
|
|Wait what happened with Gemini and historical figures?


  |u/defcon212 - 10 hours
  |
  |The AI algorithm was tweaked to be more diverse.  But it went too far
  |and you couldn't get it to generate images of the founding fathers
  |without them turning out black.


  |u/rlnrlnrln - 15 hours
  |
  |Gemini/Bard was pretty bad in the beginning. Much better now.  Edit:
  |specifically, they generated images where the founding fathers were
  |black, likely because of forced filters to provide diversity in
  |generated images. https://www.npr.org/2024/03/18/1239107313/google-
  |races-to-find-a-solution-after-ai-generator-gemini-misses-the-mark


  |u/FlutterKree - 12 hours
  |
  |Gemini was inserting diversity keywords forcibly every so often. This
  |led to black people wearing German WW2 army outfits and other shit.
  |Probably something similar to this. Maybe George Washington in an SS
  |outfit or something, or a different race?


  |u/jonomacd - 1 hour
  |
  |Google's model alignment was too aggressive, so it would occasionally
  |output images that don't really make sense. People dunked on them, but
  |actually I think they did the right thing. It's better to screw up
  |being overly cautious than to screw up by letting the model do
  |anything it wants.      It's not even remotely as bad as the other
  |things on this list.


|u/InevitableFly - 15 hours
|
|I have a sneaking feeling they were the merger and  acquisition manager
|for acquiring VMware


|u/QoftheContinuum - 11 hours
|
|And I bet he moonlighted as a structural engineer at OceanGate.


|u/MrFrypan - 14 hours
|
|Must've worked for Equifax in 2017


|u/Ordinary_Pianist_168 - 11 hours
|
|Forest Gump of I.T.


  |u/SlipperyPigHole - 9 hours
  |
  |Except this guy probably has the letters D,I, and O in between those
  |two.


    |u/git0ffmylawnm8 - 5 hours
    |
    |Dio?!


      |u/DenseAsYourMomsMilk - 4 hours
      |
      |i(dio)t


|u/DoobTheFirst - 15 hours
|
|He's irrefutable proof of The Peter Principle.


  |u/kotik010 - 12 hours
  |
  |Id imagine that pointing out that this isn't real would go a long way
  |in refuting    >!but "I have a mental illness that makes me think that
  |people will change their minds if I present the correct arguments with
  |the appropriate facts and data.", delusional i know !<  >!oh and also
  |yes jokes and all that!<


|u/ClassicHat - 13 hours
|
|Rumor has it they also worked at Enron in accounting and in risk
|management at Lehman Brothers


|u/jbog1883 - 12 hours
|
|I can tell you right now Steve down in IT has his feet up on his desk in
|Dallas going "I told them they didn't have the bandwidth and they needed
|to install the 2690, but did they listen to me?  Nope and look what it
|got them, serves them right, bunch a Amateurs."


|u/Entire_Ad_8421 - 9 hours
|
|Pretty sure they also had an internship at Ticketmaster too..


|u/Deathdar1577 - 9 hours
|
|The more I read this, the more I laughed. This guy would truly be an
|agent of chaos.


|u/N0x1mus - 11 hours
|
|Someone I wouldn’t hire because they won’t be around long enough to be
|worth our company investing time into them.


|u/Lazy-Care-9129 - 15 hours
|
|I have no idea who this person could be but another early jib change is
|forthcoming.


|u/Supernova_134 - 12 hours
|
|1 - The lack of infraestructure and planning to stream the boxing match
|between Tyson and Jake Paul.   2 - The buggy update that left almost
|every sinchronized machine with the Windows OS useless for a good couple
|of hours (maybe days?) I dont remember the date, but it was a couple
|months ago.  What about the other 3? That thing about the AI that told
|someone to kill himself was recent, but that is not related, is it?


  |u/_Spectre0_ - 10 hours
  |
  |I don’t know Gemini but FTX collapsed like the pyramid it was and SVB
  |also crashed at some point not long ago, probably the time indicated
  |in this fake resume


  |u/Tricky-Sentence - 9 hours
  |
  |Gemini was forced diversity AI. So you had prompts for "USA founding
  |fathers" becoming a picture of black guys instead of the actual
  |founding fathers.


|u/ABAFBAASD - 11 hours
|
|Assuming they worked for Quibi before FTX


|u/Key_Accountant_8343 - 10 hours
|
|You gotta f$&@ up to move up!


|u/MaybeLikeWater - 9 hours
|
|As a Astrological Gemini, I can assure you my Digital Sister didn’t mean
|any harm. It’s hard for Geminis to make choices, she couldn’t settle on
|one reality simulation to run and fell down probability rabbit holes.


|u/ichkanns - 8 hours
|
|If I saw this resume I wouldn't even call them for an interview.


|u/HoneyBadger_Cares - 7 hours
|
|Professional fall guy


|u/old_whiskey_bob - 11 hours
|
|Am I missing something? This guy spent so short of a time at each place.
|How does one become effective with so short of a stay? Most places I’ve
|worked it takes 6 months just to figure out how things work and who’s
|who.


  |u/Tricky-Sentence - 9 hours
  |
  |It is a joke. Each of these "jobs" is an IT disaster that happened.


    |u/Synergythepariah - 7 hours
    |
    |>Each of these "jobs" is an IT disaster that happened.  How was SVB
    |an IT disaster tho


|u/nick898 - 15 hours
|
|Gary?


  |u/rabbixt - 11 hours
  |
  |I think you mean Jerry


|u/Federal_Beyond521 - 15 hours
|
|So many short term jobs


  |u/jhharvest - 14 hours
  |
  |It's the best way to get a bump in your salary.


|u/gregoryofthehighgods - 14 hours
|
|A furry


|u/_WhatchaDoin_ - 14 hours
|
|Nice photoshop!  :)


|u/CompetitiveNinja6297 - 14 hours
|
|Netflix failed terribly


|u/ThePassiveFist - 12 hours
|
|Thay also did a brief stint at Kaseya in 2021.


|u/EchoPhi - 11 hours
|
|No mention of Kaseya they're hirable.


|u/DaRiddler70 - 11 hours
|
|That's awesome


|u/AlexWixon - 11 hours
|
|Or someone who has worked at these places but knows fuck all


|u/korkorahn - 10 hours
|
|Lawrence Murphy


|u/HolyMenard - 10 hours
|
|He’s unemployed


|u/Kagedbeast - 10 hours
|
|Impressive work. Lol


|u/Swerve666 - 9 hours
|
|Hasn't held any of those jobs for more than a year. That's not a good
|sign.


|u/Electricengineer - 9 hours
|
|so he had the DEI founding fathers?


|u/bl00dy_h4mm3r - 9 hours
|
|No one noticed the crowdstrike role and when they "left"?  The major
|global crowdstrike ourltage was in July...  And it only happened bc
|someone released an update in production without testing


  |u/shakedowndave - 8 hours
  |
  |This is the joke. Everything on the list is a huge failure or scandal.


|u/mythboy99 - 8 hours
|
|Head of HR at Bluzzard Entertainment.


|u/Typical80sKid - 7 hours
|
|Throw Sonos in there for Reddit


|u/spoonybard326 - 7 hours
|
|Head of social media relations, Electronic Arts, Mar 2017 - Nov 2017


|u/Capital_Release_6289 - 7 hours
|
|Similar to my cv 😭😭


|u/bogartvee - 6 hours
|
|Content Producer, Quinn


|u/ihaveaccountsmods - 5 hours
|
|If only LinkedIn let you know who that resume belongs too


|u/ihaveaccountsmods - 5 hours
|
|10x engineer


|u/narikov - 4 hours
|
|Founder of enron


|u/enzoblue64 - 2 hours
|
|Bizarre this has over 5k upvotes


|u/DeepStuff81 - 2 hours
|
|His father was on the board of Enron and was friends with Bernie Madoff


|u/Alphagaming1 - 1 hour
|
|He is just there to wreck things and leave


|u/AbsbyDec - 45 minutes
|
|But why one guy is responsible, it just waste to think this way but it
|is funny though 😂


|u/AppropriateResort960 - 25 minutes
|
|After the training periods it became apparent that this one is just a
|blender


|u/Dapper-Percentage-64 - 15 minutes
|
|Like a fucking Billie Joel song


|u/Alteous - 14 hours
|
|What happened at Netflix?


  |u/Grezzo82 - 14 hours
  |
  |The streaming of a big boxing match between an old man and a YouTube
  |celebrity had issues, likely related to lacking bandwidth.


    |u/GolDAsce - 10 hours
    |
    |We didn't miss out on much. It looked like a glorified sparring
    |session. Heavier gloves with blows that all looked to be at the end
    |both fighter's reach thus doing the least damage possible. I'd bet
    |that a play by play guy could dissect the fight even worse.


    |u/Like_Ottos_Jacket - 9 hours
    |
    |Doubtful it was bandwidth.  I'm sure it was not paying for enough
    |computing with AWS.


      |u/None_Drugs_Here - 7 hours
      |
      |It was Netflix's Open Connect platform causing issues. It is
      |pretty good at delivering video from storage upon demand, but it
      |wasnt designed for delivering content in the way that live
      |streaming requires.  Netflix will rightly get dragged through the
      |mud a bit for an issue like last night. They dropped the ball big
      |time and is well deserved, but it doesnt help that all the people
      |working on this are almost certainly not the same people that
      |developed the plaform in the first place. I dont do much coding,
      |but have you ever tried to read your own notes from years ago and
      |think "what the fuck was I talking about"? I dont envy Netflix
      |devs right now that's for sure.


  |u/qtrader9 - 14 hours
  |
  |the match between jake and mike has buffered a lot


|u/shakedowndave - 8 hours
|
|DNC Campaign Strategist? Anyone?


|u/McDumbly88 - 6 hours
|
|Bros team fucked yo for the Tyson fight though. Horrid quality and went
|down.


|u/Madismas - 9 hours
|
|How do people get jobs bouncing every 6 months to a year?


|u/bl00dy_h4mm3r - 9 hours
|
|Google also had an ossue im feb related to gemini creating images of
|black people as nazi and other odd stuff...   Not to mention netflix
|attempt to live stream myke tyson's fight.   Clearly a joke but could
|easily be true


|u/Equivalent_Spite_785 - 5 hours
|
|5 months at crowd strike huh, was he released after the disastrous
|software updates?


|u/VinylmationDude - 4 hours
|
|The same guy who’s about to get fired and start a new job at Dish


|u/Worldly_Chemist7506 - 13 hours
|
|Someone who hasn’t pasted more than roughly 6 months at any job.


|u/Sad-Lavishness-2655 - 15 hours
|
|So , he is the reason behind microsoft almost died /s


|u/Blakewilliams1213 - 4 hours
|
|Legend but his work at Netflix is subpar, because there was a ton of
|buffering during the live sports event on Netflix Paul V. Tyson last
|night


  |u/gwenmypooter - 1 hour
  |
  |That’s the joke - they are all failures


|u/augustocdias - 13 hours
|
|This can’t be real


  |u/ObviouslyTriggered - 12 hours
  |
  |It's not, but the real one is actually worse
  |[https://i.imgur.com/JKSQx6p.png](https://i.imgur.com/JKSQx6p.png) the
  |Netflix position seems to be the only technical position they held....


    |u/likwitsnake - 12 hours
    |
    |This is fake too there’s no such role at Netflix. No such thing as
    |‘Sports infrastructure’ it’s part of the Product/Engineering org.
    |Look at the description guy is pulling a gag.