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|u/Ojay1091 - 20 hours
|
|“Let us introduce you to the world of cutting…edge tools”
|u/dubsosaurus - 20 hours
|
|"They'll take the edge off"
|u/GANDORF57 - 19 hours
|
|I'm surprised they didn't pass out harakiri knives.
|u/dubsosaurus - 19 hours
|
|Now THAT'S a statement!
|u/o-0-o-0-o - 8 hours
|
|Permanent solutions are drug companies' forte
|u/dubsosaurus - 1 hour
|
|100%
|u/Joey_ZX10R - 19 hours
|
|But I love *edging*
|u/dubsosaurus - 19 hours
|
|Don't we all...
|u/camshun7 - 13 hours
|
|Horrible feeling this was deliberate
|u/Magister5 - 20 hours
|
|Swiss Harm-me Knife?
|u/dubsosaurus - 20 hours
|
|Oooooh good one! Quick on your toesies!
|u/nihilisticstar - 53 minutes
|
|Golem is that you
|u/Bombauer- - 20 hours
|
|The version without a corkscrew?! They're sick.
|u/dubsosaurus - 20 hours
|
|I know right?! Missed opportunity no doubt.
|u/notsmartwater - 5 hours
|
|They are screwed after all
|u/Bovine_Arithmetic - 19 hours
|
|The shipyard I briefly worked at in the 90s gave out branded butane
|lighters. Company policy prohibited butane lighters while on shipyard
|property (explosion hazard).
|u/Jkal91 - 15 hours
|
|"Here take this butane lighter." "oh god he has a butane lighter!"
|u/Raxmei - 11 hours
|
|One time at WM they gave out silicone "100 Days of Summer Safety"
|bracelets which we were absolutely forbidden from wearing on the job
|because they could snag in the machinery and drag us to our deaths.
|u/soaring_potato - 6 hours
|
|Obviously 100 days of llsafety was too many and they needed an
|incident.
|u/dubsosaurus - 19 hours
|
|Now that's ironic!
|u/Flashy_Narwhal9362 - 20 hours
|
|I guess the pistols were really bad for their repeat drug sales.
|u/EllisDee3 - 19 hours
|
|That's why they handed out pencils that say "Too cool to do drugs".
|Then sharpened them down. .... Profit.
|u/pez_dispenser - 19 hours
|
|Would have been better on like a little flash light
|u/PSI_duck - 15 hours
|
|Would have been better on literally anything that isn’t commonly used
|for self-harm
|u/LoveGlimmerX - 20 hours
|
|I mean, its technically true.,.
|u/dubsosaurus - 20 hours
|
|You're not wrong..
|u/Constant_Cultural - 15 hours
|
|Well better than "just do it" 😃
|u/Quangle-Wangle - 20 hours
|
|Do they give out rope too?
|u/PSI_duck - 15 hours
|
|Can confirm that getting freaky can help with depression
|u/Alternative-Box3992 - 10 hours
|
|Getting rid of your customers doesn't sound like the best marketing
|strategy...
|u/Beneficial-Oil-814 - 11 hours
|
|Maybe it’s so you can cut the noose when you decide you don’t wanna hang
|your self anymore.
|u/dubsosaurus - 11 hours
|
|Now there's some glass half full thinking!
|u/BigMack1986 - 20 hours
|
|Yes they do because there have been a few times that knife would have
|looked tempting.
|u/StardropScavenger - 20 hours
|
|Wow, thanks. My depression is suddenly cured.
|u/Ok-Alarm7257 - 16 hours
|
|I believe he needs to be in the next round of cuts by HR
|u/dubsosaurus - 11 hours
|
|Good one!
|u/DiBalls - 20 hours
|
|Lol
|u/OldeFortran77 - 18 hours
|
|The Simpsons did a 7 dwarves parody... Lenny the dwarf: why do YOU have
|a pick? You work in marketing! Moe the dwarf: if you worked in
|marketing, you'd know why.
|u/dubsosaurus - 17 hours
|
|Apparently someone who saw this reported that I might be in crisis.
|Thanks?? (ⓓⓞⓝⓣ ⓦⓞⓡⓡⓨ ⓘⓜ ⓕⓘⓝⓔ!) Reddit sent me this: There are people
|and resources here for you RedditCareResources ‹ • 3m Hi there, A
|concerned redditor reached out to us about you. When you’re in the
|middle of something painful, it may feel like you don’t have a lot of
|options. But whatever you’re going through, you deserve help and there
|are people who are here for you. - Text CHAT to Crisis Text Line at
|741741. You’ll be connected to a Crisis Counselor from Crisis Text Line,
|who is there to listen and provide support, no matter what your
|situation is. It’s free, confidential, and available 24/7. If you’d
|rather talk to someone over the phone or chat online, there are
|additional resources and people to talk to. Find Someone Now If you
|think you may be depressed or struggling in another way, don’t ignore it
|or brush it aside. Take yourself and your feelings seriously, and reach
|out to someone. It may not feel like it, but you have options. There are
|people available to listen to you, and ways to move forward. Your fellow
|redditors care about you and there are people who want to help. If you
|think you may have gotten this message in
|u/Mountain-Durian-4724 - 14 hours
|
|What's the company that made this knife it's hilarious
|u/dubsosaurus - 14 hours
|
|I don't remember. And can't find,the knife. Just have the photo I
|took of it.
|u/BourbonAchiever - 11 hours
|
|That's a really nice gesture. Good on that kind stranger!
|u/20190419 - 19 hours
|
|The other side said across for attention , diagonal for effect.
|u/False_Leadership_479 - 58 minutes
|
|Not diag, down. Cant stitch it together easily.
|u/Xaldyn155 - 20 hours
|
|Wow, I want one
|u/BananaJammies - 19 hours
|
|Guaranteed no relapse!
|u/moszippy - 19 hours
|
|Doubles as a tool for your homicidal rage.
|u/DreamyDove12 - 19 hours
|
|dont worry guys! this will cut us a lot of workk!
|u/compuwiza1 - 19 hours
|
|What's next? That engraved on a gun?
|u/Aether_Breeze - 13 hours
|
|They used to give out a length of rope with the slogan 'Hang in there'.
|u/flipcoder - 12 hours
|
|Maybe it’s Canadian
|u/According_Ad2878 - 12 hours
|
|better than therapists thats for sure
|u/Thelango99 - 12 hours
|
|I guess this is the lower budget product.
|u/NecessaryWeather4275 - 12 hours
|
|Sadist in marketing is my guess
|u/dubsosaurus - 12 hours
|
|That makes the most sense
|u/MyRockNRollSoul - 11 hours
|
|WANT!!
|u/Head_Lavishness_9813 - 10 hours
|
|Are you sure? You just shared it with how many people? He deserves a
|raise!
|u/porcelainvacation - 9 hours
|
|This is like how I heard Dont Fear the Reaper in BCBS’s hold musak
|u/happyhippy27 - 8 hours
|
|I want one
|u/MythicalMicrowave - 6 hours
|
|Same!!! Can you buy me one?
|u/brik-6 - 4 hours
|
|As a depressed person I prefer this dark humour to someone tiptoeing
|around me acting like im a piece of glass
|u/dubsosaurus - 42 minutes
|
|Sorry you're depressed. I get that way. It's the pits. I also prefer
|dark humor and think all kinds of humor are healing!
|u/sakkara - 19 hours
|
|It's actually hilarious. They deserve a raise.
|u/SarcasticlySpeaking - 17 hours
|
|New slogan: "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again!"
|u/farm_to_nug - 19 hours
|
|I mean, it's a multi tool knife... it's actually kind of clever.
|Besides, being depressed doesn't mean you're suicidal. A lot of them are
|tradesmen who use a tool like this all the time
|u/BootShoeManTv - 15 hours
|
|What tradesmen use an ultra-shitty Boy Scout pocket knife in their
|work?
|u/farm_to_nug - 9 hours
|
|Lol, you would be surprised how many men carry around a crappy
|pocket knife, especially the ones over 40. It was cool in the 90s
|u/hybridostrich - 12 hours
|
|There is nothing funny about this.
|u/dubsosaurus - 11 hours
|
|Even like...a tiny bit?
|u/dubsosaurus - 11 hours
|
|Oh wait, was it you who reported that I might need help??
|u/hybridostrich - 10 hours
|
|Nah, I ain’t no snitch bro.
|u/Powerful-Poet-1121 - 8 hours
|
|Agree
|u/ShoddyIntrovert32 - 10 hours
|
|Bad marketing team. How are they going to make money if people starts
|to off themselves with those knives. There would be no one left to buy
|there over priced pills.
|u/RingaLopi - 10 hours
|
|I imagine one would give up half way and go to ER
|u/canteatsleep - 10 hours
|
|Little did they know I was the right tool all along
|u/gyarrrrr - 9 hours
|
|They’re giving these to the doctors, not the patients right?
|u/ahh_grasshopper - 5 hours
|
|Perhaps a handy length of rope…
|u/vanillatcube - 1 hour
|
|Reminds me of funeral homes that hand out lighters that read "Thank You
|For Smoking!"
|u/dubsosaurus - 1 hour
|
|I've never heard of this!
|u/False_Leadership_479 - 59 minutes
|
|For sure! Fancy not advertising on razor blades.
|
