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Patience
March 16th, 2018
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Someone recently asked for advice on developing patience. I'm
fairly certain it was jynx (edit: link [0]), but his phlog is down
at the moment. Regardless, I've got some practice in that area and
believe I can offer some advice.
1. Treat patience like a skill to be developed. That means you
need to practice it. It doesn't mean you need to dive into the
deep end right away (to mix metaphors). There's books on the
topic as it relates to will power, but this is the key concept
at the heart of all of them. "Will power (or patience) is like
a muscle (or skill), so exercise it (or practice it).
Specifically: Buy a Kendama game [1]. Do not just start using
it blindly, though. Watch a couple youtube videos to get the
idea, then practice it. I recommend practicing it with your
off-hand and set goals that are a little bit frustrating, but
not impossible. "I will not stop using this until I can
complete this challenge at least 5 times in a row." Do not
succumb to your frustration. Push it that little extra.
2. Meditate. Give your mind some time to relax and clean itself
up. The type of meditation isn't actually that important, it's
the practice of deliberate thinking that will help. Still,
don't choose something frustrating here. This is your mental
rest equivalent of the patience exercsises above. Just set
a timer for 5-10 minutes, sit down and let your mind wander. If
find you are focusing in on any one thing for more than
a moment, gently remind yourself that you can come back to it
after the timer goes off. Reset yourself by clearing out the
brain completely for a brief moment. Here's a trick to make
that happen super fast: Think to yourself, "what will my next
thought be?"
3. Do not expect infinite patience. You're not super-human, so
don't be hard on yourself if you reach your end. Try to hang on
a bit longer and go away from the situation if you can. Don't
beat yourself up. That will make it harder to get better.
4. Vent. Whatever technique you have to blow off steam, use it.
Using yet another metaphor, think of patience like a big empty
tank inside you that can swallow the frustrations of the day.
You could keep building a bigger and bigger tank, or you can
drain it. Resting does that, but so can venting. Blow off
that frustration steam and make your job easier.
Good luck, person who I am pretty sure is jynx.
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