`Jesters` [Thread]

There I was - a young man in a crowded Chicago bar. It was 2am, and I
was slightly intoxicated.

I had just been denied by the girl I foolishly spent the whole night
talking to, and I "celebrated" by taking a couple more shots.

Suddenly, all the alcohol I had drank that night came rushing to my
bladder, so I decided to head to the bathroom before calling it a night.

After stumbling through the crowd, I finally made it to the dilapidated
bathroom that was located downstairs. When I walked in, I was met with a
shocking sight.

There, standing in the middle of the men's bathroom in a shitty bar at 2
in the morning, was a topless blonde breastfeeding what looked like a
newborn babe.

Whether I was too drunk, or just in shock at what I was seeing, I
couldn't seem to move or speak.

The silence was broken when the woman, clearly appalled that I was
staring, yelled, "Do you mind?" and proceeded to squirt her breast milk
at my face.

The woman's attempt to hit me was successful. Without saying a word -
drunkenly thinking I was somehow in the wrong - I walked out of the
bathroom, wiped the breast milk from my face, and exited the bar.

Since it all happened so fast, it wasn't until the next morning that I
was able to process the absurdity of what had happened the night before.

  [Thread]: https://reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/29hgzt/what_is_the_creepieststrangest_thing_that_has/cil06sj/