________  ________  ________
   2018-01-05                                   /        \/        \/    /   \
                                               /       __/         /_       _/
   Just kidding.                              /        _/         /         /
                                              \_______/_\___/____/\___/____/_
   It's been a while, yeh? Fuck, where do  I    /        \/        \/    /   \
even start.                                    /        _/         /_       _/
                                              /-        /        _/         /
   Somewhere around the start  of December I  \________/\________/\___/____/
had a full-on depressive episode. The weight
of  work stress, life stress,  financial stress, my impeding birthday, looming
age and the end of another year; it was just too much and I buckled. I managed
to slouch through it and I'm not too bad now but it was the  worst episode I'd
had in years and it was scary.

   Just before that whole thing I'd picked up tickets to an album launch  of a
group I'd been kind of interested in for a little while, on the other  side of
that episode I really wasn't feeling like going out but dragged my carcass out
anyway and am pretty glad I did.

   Was  pretty uncomfortable at first because, my issues aside, we hadn't been
to The Tote before and the music scene in  Melbourne's inner  north, while not
unwelcoming, it feels very cliquey.  Everyone  seems to know everyone and that
really twists into my anxiety, leaving me feeling like I'm in enemy territory.
We muddled through and found  the band room and a place out of the way. It was
actually a really nice venue, there were windows in the band room so it didn't
feel  as much like  a dungeon  as  some  of  the  other venues around there do
hahahaha. Calmed me down somewhat.

   There were four bands in  all. One was called Protection who I hadn't heard
of but I'm pretty sure  they used to be called Diecut,  or share members  with
Diecut, IDK.

   SUNDR, a Melbourne post-hardcore  band,  they were great and  I should have
picked up their album when I was there.

   Lo! were like a sludgy kind of death metal I guess, I dunno how to describe
this shit ok, I just listen to it hahaha. I'd checked out their new album when
I  saw them  on  the lineup and it wasn't really my thing but they're  amazing
live, really energetic and visceral. Dani loved them.

   The  group I'd come  to see was  YLVA, they released their debut album that
year but I'd seen them live a couple of years prior, opening for someone else.
I'd heard the album already and it's really good  so was  excited to  see them
play  it through live and they didn't disappoint. They  were loud and heavy as
fuck and it did  a lot  to clear out some  of the brain-badness.  I  picked up
their album at the gig too because for whatever reason no  one is distributing
it here, the  only  way to get it is to  order it from  the  US or UK and with
shipping it ends  up cheaper for the two of us  to  go to the show and buy  it
there than it was for me to buy it online.

   So what else is new...

   Christmas/my birthday came and  went,  new year's  eve came  and  went.  We
didn't get  up  to much for either, every year the city  feels more crowded on
Christmas and  this year it really ramped up,  it was almost  as  busy as  any
other day. It felt weird. We've resolved to do a full-on family Christmas next
year instead which should be fun.

   I feel like there's something I wanted to write about that I'm forgetting.



EOF